I took my SUV to a quantum mechanic and I think I got screwed

Harry Gordon
2 min readMay 10, 2021
Photo by Ramón Salinero on Unsplash

Does anyone know anything about cars? My SUV kept making this noise like a fan is hitting metal or something. The guy I brought it to — highly recommended by a friend — works on cars using quantum mechanics. I’m not familiar with that, but anyway, he fixed the thing and it cost over $1,000.

I asked for an estimate, but he told me an estimate was worthless since the cost he estimated now would be irrelevant at any given point in the future. I said okay, how about a ballpark? He told me on any given day it’s possible a baseball could travel out of a park, and yet still be in the pitcher’s hands. I needed to catch a bus to work, so I left it at that.

Even so, he didn’t even call me when he was working on it. He just did the work and then told me how much it was when I got there. He explained that the cost was predetermined, and someone in another shop somewhere else got the same work done, but was charged exactly one penny more. Ya, I don’t give a shit that you saved me a penny, compared to some other doofus who lived a life exactly the same as mine except for this one penny thing.

Anyway, the car runs great now. No noise, no issues. I can’t disagree that from a mechanical point of view he is quantumly better than others. But I just can’t get over the fact that he just charged me without asking. Does anyone know if fixing something like this should run over $1,000?

Oh and one other weird thing. He said I would never have the same problem again as long as I had this car but — and this is the weird part — as of this moment it’s not the same car I brought in. WTF does that even mean?

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Harry Gordon

unethical narrator, comedian, improviser, easily swayed by popular opinion